Ace of Pentacles. Manifestation.

     The Ace of Pentacles is always a nice card to find emerging from the deck, in this case the card jumped out of the deck while I was shuffling it. When this happens I usually add the card to whatever the reading is.

     The Aces are primal energies in their most potent raw form and the Pentacles are that of Earth energy. 

    The heavenly hand in the card proffers a large coin like Pentacle, which suggests that the universe is giving you a gift of earthy energy. This can come as a new job, a sum of money, a new house or an inheritance.

    Below the hand stands a garden with a pathway that leads to the mountains beyond. Within the garden are growing white flowers, lilies, which symbolise desire in its purest form. The flowers represent the seeds of pure desire coming to fruition.

   It seems that the garden is just the start of the pathway which leads us on and I see this as meaning that this material gift is meant as a means to allow us to begin or continue on our path. 

    This card has sat on my desk for several days as I have waited to see what material gift would be brought my way. It reminded me of the full moon which is present in the sky tonight a symbol of fullness in all its material glory.

    It has given me food for thought though. In Star Tarot Revelations there is a passage which struck me deeply which I will recount here.

    "You are no longer capable of doing work that is not both emotionally satisfying or spiritually nourishing. Receiving this card indicates that you are unwilling to live in the contradiction of inner contentment that is not evident in the outer world; or attainment on the external plane while experiencing dissatisfaction within. You are worthy of having it all - success that manifests physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually."

     For me this is something that speaks strongly to me. Having taken many jobs that do one or the other, I have simply reached the point that I am not capable of working in a way that is not all these things. Sadly, my outer reality has yet to catch up with this inner reality. If I take jobs that are unsatisfying to me I simply become sick or ill and cannot function, coupled with the deep feeling that the situation is not right for me.

   I have come to the point where I have had to test my faith and say no to those jobs that do nothing to nourish me. I am also having to step away from the feelings that keep me tied into these situations, those of unworthiness and desperation.

   Instead I am replacing them with feelings of hope and trust in the universe and the knowledge that these hardships are simply the result of many deeply ingrained patterns being burned away. I know there are still beliefs within me that run counter to what I am doing and I am excavating them on a daily basis so that the flow of abundance will be able to run true.

   At the moment one has become a little more obvious. I have a great book called Heal Your Body A-Z by Louise L Hay (check out the link at the bottom of this entry). Within this book it lists the mental causes for physical illnesses. While not completely exhaustive it does a pretty good job of narrowing the field to find the possible beliefs that play into physical issues. Usually it also requires a little bit of personal detective work to find the specific belief that feels true, even though you know it is not true.

    With me I have found several areas of chronic tension in my legs, muscles that refuse to relax even with direct massage manipulation or yoga. The only way I have discovered to get them to give in and relax is to find the specific belief and re-write it. So far, I have made more progress with this method than going to yoga for a year, even by doing yoga everyday for over a month!

    The latest area to undergo scrutiny is my ankles which always seem to be tense and inflexible. In the book it suggest that the ankles represent the ability to receive pleasure along with guilt. Now straight off it is difficult to immediately pin it down, since there are plenty of ways in which I am happily experiencing pleasure. But with my understanding of the chakras, the lower torso also represents the material plane...and then things start to fall into place. For me the idea that I could possibly receive pleasure while making money is one that seems untrue. Sure, it is ultimately possible for others..but for me? No. All my experiences point to it never working for me. Each new experience seems to compound this idea. But I also understand that while I hold this belief it will NEVER be any other way. 

    Changing a belief before one experiences it as a reality sounds a little ludicrous, but I have seen it work many times before. For me it is going to require a little bit of digging into the past to find exactly where this belief was born, or at least to a situation in which I felt that "Working is a miserable chore" became or was  a reality.   

   But the universe has been generous, we were gifted today with a cooked chicken, a backpack, a new flashlight and a feeling of lightness which I have not felt for a long while. Things are good and will be getting better!