VI - The Lovers. Integration of Opposites

    

     The sixth card of the Major Arcana is The Lovers card. This card is traditionally one of the most commonly known, along with the Death card and the Hanged man and is just as often erroneously simplified to the point of losing it's meaning. It is a card you will often see depicted in movies as being the quintessential card for romance and unions. The card actually has far greater depth than it seems at first glance, pointing to deep esoteric meanings...of course it can also mean romance! It's all in how you read it.

    The card itself depicts a woman and a man in the biblical garden of Eden, behind them the two trees of Life and Knowledge of Good and Evil. Upon the Tree of knowledge of Good and Evil sits a serpent. Above them, emerging from a cloud is an Angel who seems to be offering a benediction upon the two. Already we can see the card is heavy with allegory and religious symbolism. You may also notice a triangular aspect to the card, both with the three figures and the mountain behind them. This triangle is ascending upwards and so has a heavenly symbolic quality, suggesting something more than just a simple romantic coupling. The couple in the card are wearing no clothes, and while this can be seen as a direct interpretation of a biblical passage, I believe it relates to the lack of pretense between the two. That both elements come forward unadorned and free of ego.

     What the card is talking to is the integration of opposites, of male and female and of heaven and earth. The couples approach, heaven descends and the earth rises and all is well. Integration is strongly mentioned in the other cards such as Temperance and the Devil (which has many interesting parallels to this card if you lay them side by side!). Whereas the Devil suggests being bound by a union, the Lovers is about being set free by a union. That the Union of opposites in this case creates something far greater than just the sum of it's parts.

   When this card appears in a reading is concerned with bringing two opposites together. Those opposites don't always have to be male and female, it could relate to business mergers, to colours in a painting or sweet and sour in a dish. What is important is that this union is expansive and liberating, two parts that work better in conjunction. The angel is appearing because of the union of the two partners, symbolizing the higher aspect of the pairing. Unlike the Devil card, which is oppressive in it's nature and both elements are subjugated, bound and lessened by their union, this card holds powerful lessons in true synthesis as an act of expansive creativity. 

   The card is the sixth of the Major Arcana and the number six is a harmonious number, especially when it relates to the Kabbalah and the Tarot. Each of the elements has passed the halfway point and is well on it's path to completion. 

   For me in my life right now it symbolizes the need to further connect my spiritual life with my material life, that the two can come together to create something better each one lived alone. Many live their lives in only one sphere, hoping that when one is fixed they can then work on the other. It always leaves one feeling unfulfilled and lacking something. It also relates to relationships, of course, that when two beings come together it should be for something greater than what they can achieve individually. That such a union can create a powerful energy and magic, that can be used for creative and enlightening endeavors.

    The real meaning behind this card of course is Love, for Love is that powerful and energetic magic that appears between the two. That draws the Lover and the Beloved together, that springs not from either, but from their being together. As Jung said "The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemicals substances; if there is any reaction are transformed". It's positive aspect being The Lovers and it's shadow aspect being The Devil. 

   

Ace of Cups. Primal emotions.

   The Ace of Cups is, like all the aces the beginning of something new. The minor Arcana themselves typically denote an energy present in a situation. In the case of the aces, this energy is primal, new and very strong. I tend to see them as standing above the rest of the minor arcana, although not quite on the same par as the Major Arcana. 

  Cups is the suit of water (as if the large W emblazoned upon the side of the chalice didn't give it away). As such they symbolise the emotions in their watery aspect. 

    My expectation when I drew this card was that it would pertain to love as this is the attribution that is given in almost all the Tarot books I have looked over. Of course Love is the grandest of the emotions and naturally one would expect this card to be all about that. But expectations can often prove to be false as I discovered that love was not the subject of the card when I drew it.

   In the card we have five streams of water pouring from the cup and returning to the ocean below. The Chalice itself is made of pure gold and has three small bells hanging from it's neck, which one assumes would tinkle when the cup is pouring. Falling either side of the cup are watery yods (symbols of energy), twenty five in total. 

     The chalice itself is a powerful symbol, it's connections to legends, it's feminine nature and form and that it is a vessel for whatever we choose it to be. Many say the blade or the sharpened stone is the first tool invented, but I may argue that the vessel likely holds that accolade. A cupped hand or leaf was able to bring life giving water to a thirsty mouth well before we grasped a rock to smash something with. Taoism has a great reverence for the chalice and we have all heard the maxims about having to empty one's cup before it can be refilled. Chalices are present throughout the entire Tarot deck and appear not just within the minor arcana, but play prominent roles in some of the major arcana. 

        The idea of emptying my cup was what the card meant for me. In the last post I talked on finally being able to let go of a great deal of anger and frustration that I had found no place to release it to. I hadn't understood that I was holding onto this and a great many other things. 

       My life has been a search for how to return to a place of happiness that occurred many years ago. It was snatched away in the cruelest fashion and although I certainly did not want the same situation I have been looking for those same emotions that really now belong in the past. In understanding that those times have gone and with them the feelings that they encompassed. It is time to find new vistas, new emotions and new experiences. 

      I was finally able to articulate my rage at the universe for its cruelty and with it came a level of peace. In the card we see a dove, the eternal messenger of peace bringing a holy wafer with a cross upon it. To me it symbolises redemption and peace. Only by releasing suffering and emptying our cups back into the eternal ocean of the universe can it ever be refilled. 

    Beneath the godly hand offering the cup we can see an eternal ocean stretching into the distance. Upon the ocean float lily pads and their flowers. Lilies are flowers that grow from the decay and muck under the surface to create a truly beautiful flower above the waterline. They are a symbol to show that from death and decay, beauty can flower. 

    The Ace can symbolise that a new emotional beginning is in the offing, that by pouring out the dregs of our old emotional selves we can be refreshed and renewed. Our cups refilled once more and peace renewed.

   After a night purging myself of those old emotions I found the new day brought forth a whole selection of different and new options for me. My day filled up with appointments and people offered to pay early for my workshop, along with a host of other offers. It just shows that these things really do work!

   

Forgiveness and releasing grudges

  Last night I had a dream. In the dream I found myself in a village and in the village centre I saw all the townsfolk at war with each other. At first I wondered why they would be fighting and then I saw the cause. Above them hovered a gigantic spectral skull and I knew that they fought because of this apparition.  I knew that if I could vanquish this spectre then the people would be free and would no longer turn upon their neighbours. So I gave chase to the skull and used a bow and arrows that had appeared in my hands to try and destroy it. Each time I was about to deliver the final blow it would round a corner and I would not be able to line up a shot. At this point I awoke from sleep the skull still at large.
    Now you may wonder what this has to do with forgiveness and grudges, but stay with me and it will become apparent.
    Many years ago I my trust in a dear friend was betrayed. This single event has been a catalyst for me in coming to terms with many great and difficult issues for me. From this I have learned to get in touch with my anger and to understand what it is to stand up for one's own integrity. Her subsequent disappearance forced me to deal with this on an internal level since it could not play itself out in the world. Forgiveness has been out of reach for me and an earlier acceptance would have meant an avoidance of those very aspects which had caused the situation in the first place.
   Yet I find that I do not have a complete sense of peace in my heart. I doubt that the person in question will ever come forward and apologise. So is my sense of peace dependent on the fickleness of another? Forgiveness has always come easy to me until now and I had never known it was so easy because my sense of self worth and integrity had allowed my feelings to be walked upon without raising an objection. How much more difficult it becomes once one has stood for their own worth.
    One of the most difficult pieces of the puzzle is how to let go without going backwards, without offering acceptance for behaviour I know is un-acceptable. Yet without a form of acceptance there is no peace. How does one go forward in love without losing self worth and integrity or lining oneself up for repeat situations?
  In the dream the people war with one another because of this spectre of the past. I let it escape because of my own fears of what will occur once it no longer exists.
   I know that I don't wish to wait till judgement day to find my peace once more..it is too long a wait. It surely cannot rest upon the acquiescence of another even if one hopes for that. I read on forgiveness yesterday and was struck my several accounts of forgiveness. One was a priest who was beaten daily for his faith and he had advised that one must forgive entirely, that not one shred must be left. Another stated that you must forgive so entirely that the other must be allowed to save face and you cannot hold anything against them, not in word, action, attitude or posture. Visualising this for me caused me a great deal of difficulty, how so much I want the other to understand the damage done. Yet while I do this they still posses an element of power over me.
   It seems that forgiveness is the only way to fully release that, to return to my power in love. Yet one must also hold to one's course, to one's boundaries or all is lost and the lesson is lost. This situation also holds true for other situations in which grudges are held. Holding out for an acknowledgement from one who is unrepentant, unaware or unwilling is a fool's errand. This process is a delicate one and requires that each step along the road must be taken in fullness and not bypassed because one understands where the final step lays. Going through the anger, the pain and all the scars is necessary to grow as fully as possible. Any little left uncleansed remains with us and arriving at forgiveness prematurely is just as dangerous as never arriving at all.
   I have been arriving at that place in myself in which I can feel love for those that have wronged me, yet be able to see, free of judgement that they are damaged and not feel the need to push that upon them. Each person is necessarily at a different point and for some no less than exclusion is necessary to maintain my boundaries comfortably. Others I could allow back into my life if they wished it so, with loving conditions. There is a teasing apart of all that comprises each relationship and understanding where the boundaries need to lay and it is a process that has to rely only on my own inner authority.
   

3 of Swords. Heartbreak and break up.

  The symbolism of this card is pretty apparent, the three swords piercing the heart through with a cloudy backdrop just shouts heart ache and sorrow.
   I was concerned when I drew this card and Zoe gave this card a look and said we might be in for some friction. I left the card to sit for a while, because quite honestly I wasn't feeling a great deal of heartache. The card has sat for a few days now and I have not noticed any unusual friction within my own life. I have however noticed a great deal of it going around.
    Many of the women in the periphery of my life have been struggling to extricate themselves from difficult relationships, relationships that have included abuse emotionally and sometimes even verbally. Friction is not uncommon within relationships, but sometimes it is more than simple two individuals rubbing each other the wrong way. In these instances breakup is only ever going to be the healthy option.
    The heart in the card is pinioned by three blades from above, the clouds are dark and rain falls. Yet behind the heart is illumination showing that beyond the heartache something new and fresh lies beyond.
     Heartbreak is difficult, but sometimes the heart needs to be broken open so that it can feel once more. The walls we build around our hearts are often strongly re-enforced and nothing short of a sundering will bring them down. This is not the falling walls of The Tower card, it is an energy that can be felt and risen above regardless of its intensity.
   The three swords in the card also speak of a trinity connected to the heartbreak. This may be another person in the dynamic or an external event outside two individuals. Wherever three instances occur there is often something greater happening.
    A colleague of mine (who I am yet to meet) has informed everyone at the healing centre that we all currently going through a process of letting go of old emotions as our spirits are being elevated. I am unsure of whom he is meaning when he states this (I get the feeling he is talking globally) asI usually don't connect easily to these mass trends occurring. Although in this case I have felt rather emotionally unusual in the last few days and have heard similar reports from those around me. It may be astrological, circumstantial or synchronous but it is definitely occurring, at least to me and those within my immediate circle.
     I was able to cast of this unusually morose upsurge of emotions this afternoon and I feel it may be related also to witnessing people throwing off unhelpful energetic structures and attachments.
    But back to the subject of heartbreak. When we release these old attachments, it can feel like our hearts are pierced through. One interesting thing to note is that this card falls in the suit of swords which are in the mental realm. One would assume heartache should fall within the realm of cups or emotions, yet it doesn't. What are we to make of this unusual detail? Is it possible that this heartache is occurring due to damage to the ego?
      The swords are piercing and destroying the heart and in doing so are removing our illusions about love and its influence in our life. Nothing can actually harm our immortal spirit, but the emotional constructs we build up around ourselves can certainly be shattered and if we are strongly attached it can certainly feel like our spirits are being torn asunder. The true connections we have with one another can never really be harmed, it is only our frail emotional bodies that suffer when we break up. It is the attachments we held in our hearts that are really sundered. It is an illusion that is painfully real that has been pierced. If there is nothing left when the attachments are lost then it suggests that there was nothing there to begin with, but those we are truly connected with are not lost through simple emotional turmoil.
   You can love someone dearly, lose them and yet not suffer heartbreak through an understanding of the continuation of spirit. When heartbreak and pining for the lost attachment occurs, it is not the person you mourn but the loss of illusion and what you thought was real. This difficult moment can be used to see what illusion you were so attached to in the other and then use it realise that part actually lies within you. Heartbreak is a powerful lesson and many people try and leave it behind as quickly as possible without seeing that within it are the seeds to avoid it happening again to us, if we would only stop to see what it is we feel we lost.
   So if you are suffering from heartbreak or loss, remember that we never truly lose loved ones, it is their influence or what they represented to us that we are mourning.
   
   

2 of Cups. Soul Mates and conscious relationship.

  The Two of Cups is often regarded as the most romantic of the cards and the one (apart from the Lovers card) that most people want to see in a reading regarding relationships. The Lovers card is Major Arcana though and as a result is often speaking of the conjunction of male and female energies, which does not always signify relationship between a man and a woman (or any loving couple).  The Two of Cups however signifies partnership.
   Looking at the card you can see that the figures are sharing their cups (emotions) with each other and there is a definite connection between them both. Both figures wear white clothing beneath their more colourful attire and this symbolises a purity and innocence of motive. The woman wears a blue tabard symbolising communication and the man wears a yellow tunic and tights for the intellect. This is interesting as those traits stereo-typically match how each gender connects to a relationship. She also wears a laurel wreath for victory and he wears a circlet of roses for the heart.
    There is also a more esoteric element to the card. The symbol springing from their touch is called a caduceus. It is generally regarded as the symbol for medicine, though this is a superficial corruption of its original meaning. It symbolises the rising of kundalini energy up the spine (the central line, often called the Sushumna). The two serpentine shapes twining around the central column are the masculine and female energies or the Ida and Pingala. As a person integrates and balances their own internal masculine and feminine energies the collective energy in the central column rises to the eventual goal of enlightenment.  Typically the head of the staff is adorned with wings alone.
     In this instance it is topped with the head of a red lion. The red lion is an alchemical symbol for fire or sulphur, one of the main ingredients for turning base metals into gold. Jung felt this meant philosophical metals within the psyche rather than actual metal and I have an inclination to agree (not that I would rule out there being a material equivalent!).
     What I feel this means is that enlightenment can be found through relationship and I would possibly even go so far as to say it is impossible to find it without, even if that relationship for some is a purely internal affair.
     Interestingly I see that the point of caduceus springs forth from the touch between the pair in the card. Since the lion means enlightenment through fire (sulphur) I believe it is speaking of the chemical and elemental connection that happens between soul mates.
      This brings up the consideration of soul mates in which there are many different opinions and considerations. My understanding lies upon the line that some souls are more connected than others, whether through living together previously in past lives or simply by virtue of their individual make-ups. Some people you meet you just feel connected to...almost immediately in some cases. When two people meet who are connected in such a way connect, then there is a sacred fire between them which is a seed for powerful growth and change through the element of love.
      I believe that there are soul companions who are beings that you have travelled with through many lives, with who you might feel an immediate connection to even if it is not romantic. These can turn into romantic connections and in fact are more powerful than a relationship built only lesser attractions. Often these companions are catalysts for growth and change in our lives and open us up to ultimately connect with ourselves.
    In order to open up sufficiently to find your soul mate requires a great deal of inner work and purification. Otherwise you simply attract whichever mate is needed for your growth at that time. Let me get this straight, there is nothing wrong with this and without these mates there would be no chance to find our true partners.
   The words twin flames and soul mates are bandied about a lot without any real understanding of what it means. It is unlikely you will attract someone who is resonating at a high frequency unless you yourself are also resonating at this point. The idea that a prince charming will arrive and rescue you from your own inadequacies is very slim, unless you have set yourself on the road to serious self improvement. Simply wishing for it will not make it so, you must step out on the road to make any progress upon it.
   Many relationships can be catalysts for growth, propelling us and challenging us to move and grow with each new obstacle or adventure. This card is about finding a connection that helps us reach that new level. It is about that magical spark that ignites between two people causing them to become greater than the sum of their parts. Each person brings their own qualities and is able to share them with the other.
      Typically a relationship is a contract between two individuals based on conditional understandings between the two for their mutual security and to provide them with the energies that they themselves are unable to provide for themselves. As time progresses there is a tendency to slip into complacency and to form rigid patterns or expectations based around the other person. You stop seeing them as a vital growing being and start seeing them as a provider of things you require. Arguments begin based on these subconscious contracts and the beautiful opportunity to grow is lost, submerged under the misplaced expectations of our partners. When this happens we are no longer growing...we may be aging, but we certainly are not moving forward.
    We have all seen the sad situation of when a rigid couple breaks up and they both return to the emotional and mental age at which they decided to stop growing (usually at the point the relationship began in earnest and the magic died). If they could maintain a level of consciousness then this wouldn't occur and if they needed to be apart then it would happen organically.
     The two of cups for me only re-iterates what I know and reminds me that conscious relationship is the way forward for the human race. I only enter into conscious relationships, anything else is a waste of my time. Zoe and I have a relationship that is open to growth, to change and to allowing each of us the space we need as individual beings.