Thursday, April 3, 2014
In the first dream a few nights ago I was in the park with a co-worker and we were playing with a huge male lion. Both of us stood side by side and we were tossing a ball(?) for the lion to chase after. Much like you would for a dog. I decided to step away from my friend and we stood across from each other. He tossed the ball towards me and the lion charged across the field towards me. I was pretty frightened in the dream as the lion was full grown and being charged by one felt like a terrifying experience, even if I was not the subject of his attentions.
As he neared I took a folded cloth from my pocket and unwrapped it, it was a bright leaf green and I knew it would act as a kind of "Kryptonite" to the lion, weakening him. It was made of fabric and the size of a small towel which I then held up in front of me.
The lion appeared disappointed and then spoke to me saying "You aren't going to use that are you?" before the dream faded. He spoke in a regal voice and I got the impression I was doing him a dis-service by even thinking about using such an item. It left an impression on me, but I could not figure out what it could mean. I ascribed to it that maybe I was afraid of my own authority, or that I was trying to weaken my own strength and courage, but the fact that I had a second dream with similar symbols suggests I missed the point.
The second dream involved me selling a muscle car to an interested buyer, who wished to have me put the car on top of his car so that he could drive it home in a convenient fashion. The only problem being that he was having trouble seeing out from underneath the car I placed on top of his. I then went indoors to receive my payment. I approached the counter and the teller brought out several large bearer bonds (the promissory notes banks often hold in their vaults) and wanted to pay me with those. My family was close on hand and were quick to inform me that that type of money was no good and I should refuse it, given the difficulty I would have redeeming it. As I flipped through the folder and was looking at all the bonds within I noticed a very large and thick solid gold coin, maybe 5" in width and easily 2-3" deep. It was inscribed with the picture of a lion facing forward with one of it's paws raised, along with several other symbols and embellishments. As soon as I saw the coin I knew that it was very valuable and all my doubts dissolved. I felt a feeling of rightness and even considered wearing it as an amulet or medallion. I then returned to the cheap circular tables at which my family were gathered and felt vaguely disappointed with them.
The dream then moved to a perspective of me stood outside a rich manor house and I was looking for a lion statue, which I was supposed to kneel before upon it's discovery. There were several small lion statues around the property carved from black soapstone, with the lions stood rampant. But I felt these were not the correct statues and when I found them I would know and they would pass on something valuable to me. The dream finished with a whispered voice exhorting me to find the lions.
The lions are trying to pass a message along to me, which I am patently failing to grasp. The strength and the power of the lion in the first dream was dramatic and stayed with me long after waking, along with a feeling of vague disappointment. In the second dream, it appears that I am being led in a certain direction by the lions in the dream, along with the promise of a large reward upon completion of the transaction.
I took a look through several resources and they all point to lions being symbols of power, strength, boldness, courage and authority. It is also my sun sign (along with several other planets), but I believe this is the first time that a lion has appeared in my dreams with such clarity.
I am curious as to where the lions will lead me...
Monday, March 10, 2014
So, it's been a while...
But I have been busy!
I successfully graduated massage school late last year and have signed a contract for a new space in town. So, I'll be practicing in a professional setting and building a business for myself.
You can check it out by going to my services page or going to this address:
I hope to get back to writing my blog more fully soon!
Monday, January 14, 2013
It has been almost a year since my last posting here. The previous year has been one of difficulty and hard work. I have had several jobs in the interim, some better than others, but all of them a trial. My free time has been absorbed and I have become like one of those poor male stereotypes that spend all their time in the office at the expense of the rest of their lives. Regardless, this period is coming to a close. All my hard work is going to pay off in that I am about to take a full time massage course in the near future. I have applied for a loan (unsuccessfully) and several scholarships with the idea that they will ease my progress through this next phase. I am also looking into taking up a part time job to help with the schooling and basics. Regardless there is still a feeling of dissatisfaction with my current situation, that something is not quite correct. From this I had a dream last night, which had some interesting symbolism. I thought this would be a good jumping off point for getting back into the mindset of writing and washing away the psychic crud that has accumulated from my hectic work life.
The dream was set in the medieval courtyard of a castle. I was learning to fence, to fight with a sword and my partner stood opposite from me. A teacher of some type, an amalgam of my mentor at work and other elements instructed me on the fine points of swordsmanship. I wasn't proving the best of pupils as I didn't feel particularly enthused about the whole thing and wasn't really interested in the threat of war that proved the backdrop for the dream. At one point, he showed me how slow I was by bringing his blade to the side of my neck. I for some reason was carrying a hunk of wood and it was too heavy and cumbersome to stop the swing with, although it did remind me upon waking of the shield of Thorin Oakenshield from the Hobbit (In the movie the dwarven prince used a chunk of oak to block a blow from an orcish menace, thus earning his name and the respect of his peers).
At first I could see no connection and could not understand what was bring communicated. The first element of the dream seemed concerned with my work and my lack of real interest in what I was trying to learn. Which is true, I feel no connection to my job and am un-interested in the greater picture it represents. The oaken branch runs along with a lot of kingly symbolism I have been seeing over the last few months in my dreams.
The second part of the dream struck home for me when I recognised that it wasn't me in the dream trying to earn money for his family and lifestyle. That I wasn't myself seemed relevant and important. The fine robe Jamal had seemed to speak of a royal connection or some position of standing and I couldn't understand why he was hoping to steal pennies from guardsmen. I didn't see why he didn't just become what the robe seemed to indicate he was. The robe was richly coloured and embroidered with what one would expect from either a fine African prince's garments or a Japanese silk robe designed for royalty.
The dream seemed to be communicating that I wasn't acting in accord with who I really am, that I was doing things that were not reflective of myself. Not only are they unlikely to bring enough to support myself or my family, but they are beneath my standing....if I could only accept it of course.
When I awoke I returned to the dream state to see if I could wear the robe in a more conscious fashion. I found that letting go of the idea of who I thought I was, was more difficult than I realised at first. The garb of the rogue and cutpurse, represented a certain way of living I had learned to adopt. Do I deserve to walk as a prince? The idea of that was scarier than I would have imagined and I had to strip away the leathers I wore as a thief before wearing the robe seemed right. When I put it on in the dream state I could feel my body responding and found myself relaxing to a much deeper state and felt blood flowing through my legs into areas that have been tense for a long while.
Accepting who I am and not what has allowed me to survive is a task I hope I am up to. It is a terrifying prospect and one I hope to be able to hold onto. For the first time I can see that the job I am currently doing is not right for who I am and is not the right way for me to go, it is just where I am now. I shall not judge myself for not being able to feel it, because I would not have been able to see a better way to go until this point.
P.S. The Hobbit is awesome! Go see it or read it!
Saturday, April 14, 2012
The picture on the card depicts a youth, usually one of watery emotional disposition ( a dreamer usually) who is examining a fish he holds within a chalice. The youth is colourfully dressed in red, blue and yellow with lotuses embroidered on the tunic. On his head he wears a whimsical looking hat and scarf which looks reminiscent of a wave, both in colour and shape.
The lotus, we have discussed before is a symbol of the ability to transform waste into beauty and is analogous with the chakras, both in form and function.
The youth is stood in somewhat of a theatrical stance, he almost looks as though he is an actor in a play about to break into song about his fish. In this way we can understand the basic demeanor of the youth within the card. He is playful and doesn't take life too seriously.
The fish for me is a symbol of dreams, like fish they swim just beneath the surface of the unconscious, breaking the surface occasionally and returning to the depths just as quickly. The youth has a good connection with his dreams, both the type of dreams we have at night and the type we hold aloft and aspire to. The former being a form of guidance in order to accomplish the latter.
As with the youth, I have a good connection with my dreams remembering them almost nightly and sometimes more than one if I am on the trail of a particular idea. Recently I have been practicing my ability to journey. Journeying is the ability to travel consciously into the realm of dreams and bring back information from the unconscious, similar to a diver looking for pearls. At first it is difficult in the journey to separate an over-active intellect from the true subconscious material, although even the material your intellect delivers is affected by the tone of the subconscious material it is attempting to convey. In this way even material that seems over-intellectualised or imagined is useful because it is coloured by genuine information.
Recently though I have found that my intellect has taken too direct a hand in trying to classify, objectify and extract meaning from the material brought forth. Like a young actor in a scene I have become overly invested in the reason for a character's actions rather than remaining true to the emotional core of the role. In doing so the energetic core can become lost in the egoic process of examination, forever marginalised to a sideline as it has to be "worked out".
The card is a reminded to return to the whimsical energy of the dream and not get caught up in intellectualising or allowing the mind too much control. This has been a common thread with several journeys recently in allowing the unconscious material to surface without overlaying or submerging it with the weight of analysis. A tendency I fear I have had for too long.
I have found that remaining open to seeing whatever emerged without allowing my mind to immediately begin analysis has been most fruitful. An example being that in a recent journey I perceived what seemed to me to be a feathery wing. Immediately my mind began to try and classify the phenomenon. Maybe it is a pegasus or a bird, maybe a dragon or a feathered serpent. In doing so I began to lose the connection to the genuine material that was emerging and falling into my mind. In learning to meditate and to journey the mind has learned to take a back seat in order to allow the phenomena to emerge, yet all it has done is wait till a later step in the process to attempt to assume control.
The figure of the youth on the card is also symbolic of another situation in my life. A recent journey yielded information about several plants that would be helpful for me. I sat on this information for quite a while, since I doubted it's veracity. My perception that I didn't know anything about herbalism or plant remedies stood in the way of using the information I received. In the journey I was shown snapdragons, a willow tree and then taken underwater to be shown kelp. It was a simple and quick journey and my mind was quick to dismiss any likelihood that it would hold value.
Late last week, Zoe and I were at New Frontiers (a health food store) where I was tentatively looking for the plant mixtures. I was having a difficult time following my intuition on it and had been looking at the blue-green algae instead ( I had been told it was very good for you, even if it was expensive). As I was looking at the suppliments I saw a jar containing Icelandic kelp. This reminded me that it was kelp and not algae that had appeared in my journey.
On a whim I decided to see if there was any of the other plants available (I was pretty certain Snapdragon was not available). Instead I found that all three were available, even Snapdragon in an essence form. A friend of mine who works at the store was helpful enough to print off what all three plants were for and it turns out that it corresponds exactly with several of the issues that I have been working on. As a result I have been drinking down the plant essences and it has really helped. Tensions that I have been working on for a long while are disappearing almost overnight and the domination of my mind wanting a stranglehold over what I am doing is slowly loosening.
I do feel like the character in the card, especially when I often have a cup of whichever essence I am now taking inspired by the journeywork.