Getting to the core of it.

  Yesterday I encountered the ghost of poverty past and now it is time for me to get the the actual core of the issue. So far whenever the issue of money is raised, it is followed by a spectre who believes it is in my best interest to be worried, concerned and at all costs...frugal.
   Even with this limited exposure to this new awareness I am aware that he is simply protecting a core belief which would be challenged if this issue were to suddenly disappear. The core belief is what creates the necessity for a guardian, without the belief the guardian simply disappears, or more correctly is re-assigned to a more relevant duty.  Rather than protecting an outdated ideology he becomes a proponent of the new more beneficent thought model (of course until that model becomes outdated).
    So I have been digging past the spectre to uncover what moldering belief systems he is actually trying to protect. Since I am aware of his concern, I can be gentle and understanding in that this part of my psyche is only trying to protect me.
    The thought pattern he adheres to is that I don't have enough and he is happy to inform me of this whenever I get it into my head that I want to expand in certain areas, typically financial..although taking a quick look at the core suggests it is significantly more important that that alone.
    Digging down I am finding that the belief is that spiritual energy is not able to directly affect matter. This is not an uncommon belief system and I would imagine that typically this belief is actually held by the majority of the populace, those who don't agree with this usually belong to fringe elements and are typically seen as great candidates for snug white jackets. Whether they are right or not seems largely irrelevant.
   My own belief system as it stand as of writing this article is that spiritual energy can affect matter, but only in an indirect fashion. With healing, I am affecting the dormant systems of the body to heal at a greater rate through some undiscovered but still very real method. There is certainly enough evidence to go along with this and typically is only hardcore materialists who have a problem with mind affecting body. This belief has worked great for me, and it makes it easy to try and explain my actions to skeptics and materialists. I don't have to lose their possible respect and can still be a pioneer standing on the edge of discovery. I am not quite one of those madmen wandering far from the defined borders of conventional wisdom who should definitively be avoided.
   Of course, if spiritual energy did directly affect materiality then I would hardly need to be concerned with the opinion of those who were clearly uninformed. The problem with this is that I understand that one's belief system does very clearly affect the way in which one interacts with the world. The very fact that I don't believe it can affect matter directly causes that particular reality to become concrete for me, so I never have to run into that particular bugbear.
   Money has and is the biggest example of this in my life. Trying to manifest money has led to no real tangible success for me, but beneath it all I don't really believe that I can direct the flow of money into my pocket. This very fact prevents it from occurring. Sure I can believe that I can affect it indirectly..being more positive is likely to affect my outlook in a job search or in an interview therefore smoothing the turning of the cogs. A positive frame of mind is always a boon and even the most difficult of materialists would have a hard time disputing this in a balanced fashion.
   But the very fact that this has emerged as an issue suggests that the inherent belief is faulty. One can find that even the workings of quantum mechanics suggest that the observer directly affects the outcome of the experiment, even if no verifiable proof of it occurring on larger scales than the molecular level is possible (a problem with the difficulty of such an experiment as I understand). Bringing up this idea of course meets resistance and I have been in many situations where talking about these ideas creates friction and disbelief.
   So, the question remains. If the belief that spiritual energy cannot directly affect matter is faulty and while I hold onto that belief all I do is cement that system in my own psyche how do I step beyond this without just floating away on clouds of fantasy?
    This leads to an impasse that cannot be surmounted without a level of faith which would then logically furnish one with the proofs I have been seeking. So there is no progression beyond this without a leap of faith and as I understand it there is no real risk. My current system of belief has led me to the impasse and it will allow no further growth. Since I am left with either sticking with a broken system or exploring out into the hinterlands of faith in the hope that I will find the necessary puzzle piece, it seems that there really is no realistic choice but to try it out...